Friday, October 5, 2012

Shimmering Down

I wore this top which is very shimmery but hard to fully see through photos. This is my second time wearing it, the first time I wore it without a white tank underneath and as a crop top. I also dressed it up to play up the shimmer. 

I want to discuss something with my readers. What I will refer to in this post as my "shimmering down". Living in Japan, naturally has its challenges for any non-full Japanese person. Yes, even half- Japanese people have some challenges here. Naturally, my personality is very bubbly, friendly, and extroverted. I find that when I'm with my friends or people who already know me, and when we happen to come into contact with strangers; I am almost always the center of attention. Not because I'm trying to be, but because I obviously don't look like anyone else so people want to ask me questions (sometimes many) out of curiosity. Lately, even on this particular night, I tried to "shimmer down" my clothes, my personality; so I can attract less attention to myself. It didn't work this night and it never really seems too...

My best friends have been in my life for so many years that we are more like sisters than friends. But it is really a challenge making new girlfriends in Japan. I know its annoying being with me when people just want to ask me the same questions as if I'm some exotic animal in the zoo. I feel like that a lot here. The staring, the creepy men... I'm sure anyone who has been to a mono-ethnic country and looks different from that ethnicity can understand.

I had a lot of drama this night regardless of my efforts to attract less attention to myself. Point is, I can't change who I am and in no way do I want to! Whether I shimmer down or not, people will still see me as different. So, I might as well fully be myself.

My situation reminds me of the Gossip Girl episode when Blair tried to ruin her mom's fashion show by getting rid of all the models so Jenny convinced Serena and Poppy's friends to walk instead. I re-watched it to find the quote! 

Poppy: "I was best friends for years with a girl like Blair and, it was subtle, but I was always having to make myself less sparkly so that she wouldn't feel insecure. So one day I realized that is just crazy because a true friend would want you to be your most beautiful, vibrant self."
Serena: "But I really just don't want to hurt her."
Poppy: "I know, I know... but is that a good reason to hide your light?"

Has anyone else been in this situation??

H&M top, Free People tank, TopShop jeans, Zara heels, Rosebud (Japanese brand) clutch, 
Bershka necklace, Nastygal ring, Jacob & Co. watch

*Never dim your light*


fizz said...

I just found your blog through IFB and just from this entry alone I am intrigued to follow! It must be challenging being mixed and living in Japan. Plus you are absolutely gorgeous so it's natural that you would get tons of attention! I have never experienced the situation you've described, I've always been more of a wallflower. Although I do stand out somewhat because of what I like to wear, I'm pretty introverted and awkward whereas my close friends are comparatively flirtatious and outgoing. It never bothers me though because I am comfortable in my own skin. I would never want them to tone it down! I like to think of myself as more of an acquired taste, someone whom it takes a bit more of an effort to get to know. Anyways, just my two cents. I am following your blog via bloglovin now and would love it if you could check out mine!


Sick by Trend said...

Your t-shirt is soooooo cool!

I'm following, check my blog and follow me if you like